Communication: Can You Hear Me Now?

As men we use our conversation to communicate clearly. Our communication gives clarity and gives us our space. Men communicate to say, “Don’t push me around or this is what I know and this is what I think period.” Ladies on the other hand communicate for other reasons such as feeling closeness and just being together. Women feel closer to their husbands in conversation and men can’t figure out why they just go on and on and on. After a while some men just tune their wives out and let them talk while they read the paper or watch television. This is a recipe for trouble in any marriage.

Alright men, when it comes to communicating with the ladies it’s done different than with the guys at work or on the ball field. If you’re in a heated discussion with your wife and you need a breather to think or cool off then learn to communicate that properly, but men don’t stay in the mental cave too long. Stay focused on your relationship and steer clear of threats or ultimatums.

Let’s review some principles that will help us communicate more effectively. Remember that these go both ways. The first point is that of…

1. Praise- By telling your spouse what you love about them first they will be more open to hearing the challenge and you too will remember why you love your spouse in the first place. Praise her daily and remember a little maintenance goes a long way.

2. Follow the Golden Rule taught by Jesus in Matthew 7:12 This rule teaches us to do to others what we would have them do to us. If you want to be treated a certain way, then treat her the same way. If you need some respect in the house then give some respect in the house.

3. Learn Together- Study your spouse and make your marriage job 1. This includes learning new things together where neither one is the authority on the issue. IN this neutral plane connections remade. And finally, remember the non-verbals.

4. Non-verbals- don’t forget that our words are only 7% of our communication, our body Language at 55% followed by our tone of voice at 38%.

When these steps are followed you’re ready to propose a solution to any problems you may face. Philippians 2:4 gives us the best counsel it reads, “Each of you should look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” It takes a little bit of work and a lot of effort, but the reward is worth it. A healthy marriage is priceless.